I Made It!

I have been M.I.A., but Things. Are. Happening.

I was driving the other day and a song came the main chorus being I MADE IT! That is how I feel at this exact moment I made it through this year. I have been teaching for four years and hands down this year has been my most challenging. I have had my cell phone stolen, candy, peeing on the carpet, a few fits thrown, and more sad stories that I cannot share and I handled it, well I cried a lot in the privacy of my own home; sometimes with really big glasses of wine in hand. That being said, I went from teaching at a school that had a mostly middle class population to one that is 87% free and reduced lunch.

The biggest obstacle that I had to overcome this year was accepting how unbalanced things in life really are. I taught at a school before that was not a “title” school. Kids had their basic needs met. They had food. They were safe. They were clean. They had books at home and were read to. Now I see kids go home with Friday backpacks and tell me they are never read to. There are fantastic kids at this school and it makes me sad that they are not given the same opportunities that the kids I taught before are.

It has also been hard for me to realize I cannot feel sorry for some of my kiddos. (Otherwise, I will never stop crying) I cannot change the situation that they might be facing. I can provide a stable place for them to be during the day. I also have to make them accountable. At first it made me feel like a witch, but now I realize I am teaching them skills that they need to know in the real world. For example I had one kiddo ( with a sad story) who was tardy everyday and it was affecting student’s schoolwork. I also learned it was because of this student’s attitude at home that he/she was late. I made her/him pull a ticket for everyday he/she was tardy. (My students earn tickets for fun Fridays.) I tell them this is a job. Their job. They need to treat it as such.

At times I feel like a social worker, a counselor, a parent, a mediator, and I still have to teach these kiddos to read and write!?!? So yes, at the end of this year I sit and think about how much I have grown and my eyes have been opened to some harsh realities. The cool thing is my students taught me and I think I did a good job of teaching them too. I MADE IT!